Saturday, April 30, 2011

BlackBird BlackView.......

  • Today there is happiness, tomorrow there will be sorrow. Today there is story the next moment there will be song. Now you are with friends, sometime later you may be alone. The journey that U r continuing today will come to an end someday.
  • Life is a flirt. In some way it attracts you and keeps you attached with it.
  • It's so sad that feelings play with heart. The variable feelings wander place 2 place but heart remains there only.
  • If you know there is no way out from something, just move a step further into it
  • Life is a state of violence.
  • Success will never let U stay in peace; failure will never let U keep quiet. hope drives us insane and despair makes us so heavy, we fell difficulty even to carry our own weight. LIFE, INDEED IS A TRAGIC COMEDY.
  • The sadness that has been sincere till today has become my only friend hat is adamant about not leaving me. I want to separate from it, but how can I leave this true friend ???
  • Life is Like wine, once get addicted u cannot leave it. once who takes birth lives till death.
  • It seems life has decided to put me in trouble always. But that is the beauty of life. Unless there was pain, we would not have experienced what pleasure is.
  • It was raining when I got out of the office and I walked to the bus stop. Getting drenched in rain has always been fun for me. Still there is a pleasure in getting wet in either way.
  • Today we are ESTRANGED and the reason is you. You are the one who shunned me. But remember if I can offer you a Rose, I am also capable of putting a bullet from Gun.
  • ...but now I feel I must kill those feelings and bury somewhere in myself only.
    • world is a wretched place
    • Do dreams have restriction?????? Sometimes.... they do have.
      • The sun does not sweat and clouds don't wet themselves
        Life is infected by life itself. Patience has
        become patient. Breathes go breathless. Alas! life is healthy in a sick

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Things that I cannot get back

Do you still make paper boats and put them in water when it rains???????? Do you play with toy cars now or make sand houses or dig tunnel in the heap of sand?????

Do you still fly kites? I miss them a lot. Once I used to. Or do you now argue with your dad to buy you chocolate and ice cream??????

Don’t you miss the girl now who you could not say something you wanted to ????

Life is a continuous process of losing so that we can gain something. This statement of mine has same as that of the proverb ‘To gain something you have to lose something’. Some might see it in a different way. There should be a blood group C- (c negative), for people like me. Unfortunately it is not there. 

Coming back to the topic, life, however, is not a profit or loss statement. Due course of time what we go on losing is time. The very first thing that I would like to talk about. For every second we miss we get to know a new time. Think if we hold this Monday then how we can get another Monday. I mean to say for the things we go on missing we come across new things. 

Life is simple, complicated and also interesting. Very much contradicting. In our life there are a lot of things that we can put to list of ‘things I cannot get back’. A lot of things, I said it wrong.  Till the very second you read this statement, you can add all to list.  I was a kid once. Can you be a kid once more? At times you can act only like that but going back is not possible. There is no going back in life. Life is a time machine that can take you forward only. As I missed my childhood, from a teenager I became an adult. Today I am 23 and once I was 12. I cannot be again a boy of 13 or 15. That stage of my life is gone and I have come through it. Now I can only recall what I used to do during those days. If you compare life with a staircase, for each step you rise up, you can look back but you cannot go to the previous step, it gets broken.

I used to go to primary school, then to high school. I completed my schooling to get into a college.  The next step was engineering college. You see, all these things I have or you have done, have got a different beauty. It is inappropriate to say that I have not enjoyed those days. We all enjoy but someone takes more pleasure and someone less.  So whoever you be reading this article of mine, try to take maximum from life or get more from life. Hope you understand me. You must enjoy to the fullest of the moment you live. Because you see you cannot get them back again. Later you will be thinking I wish I would have done this done that. Why regret if you have not done something? You must have been through something that others have not.

Once you enter professional level, I tell you, you will crave for those days. I had a lot of friends in college; we used to play counter strike for hours and hours. Used to watch movie together. College life was real fun.  Today I miss them.  I graduated in 2010 and now I am a professional. What I can do is go through the moments captured by camera or my diary where I cascaded my days.  When you do it there is also joy.

I am staying in Bangalore, I miss my parents. Yesterday morning when I got up I remembered mom, two drops of tears came out of my eye. In college whenever we got holiday like Dushera, or winter vacation or summer vacation, there was delight an excitement that we are going home. Today I want to go home, I can but I have less holidays. 

Till now this much, later perhaps I can share more experience. Hope you don’t get bored, there are still a lot of things left and you can think about what you are missing.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Daily Life

Daily life. When I was in school I used to write that essay. Here I am not going to repeat that. In those days I wrote what ever I did with time everyday and notice one thing. Did you ever write about Sunday there?

We used to describe whatever we did from the time of waking up till we went to bed in that essay. That was once just a task for us then except that we never bothered about what our daily life was. But after getting a job or being a grown up person if you really think how our daily life is today, it seems pretty busy. In fact, no one has got time to spend on thinking about it. 

My younger brother would always complain how much to do the things regularly everyday. It is so boring.

So I was forced by my daily life to muse over it for a while. And life has changed. Changed in the sense it has fallen into another pattern. For a certain period of time it runs in the same way day by day. I was watching the movie ‘TITANIC’. Every one knows the movie is a classic piece. What did you learn from the movie? Obviously no one asks you that.  But I have a bad habit of watching movie alone and I jot down whatever dialog touches me. So it was a line from Da Caprio in the movie that meant – he does not know where life will take him tomorrow. But people like you (all those with who he was dining) know what you gonna be doing tomorrow. There is no change. I was playing cards, I won the tickets to this Titanic and now I am having dinner with you. Tomorrow I will be somewhere else’

In my college days the 1st thing after getting up was to turn on the laptop and listen to rock music. Before that I used to go for morning walk or jogging when I was in school. Now at the same time I have to wake up, take bath and wait for the bus to go the office. See the way life is changing. 

We get so much involved in life that we don’t even think of getting out and look out of it. Daily spending 9 or more hours in office sitting in front of a computer and doing the task of a software engineer from a fresh graduate I feel really boring. But I have to do it. Only Saturday and Sunday are relaxing. Then there is the only thing that clouds the mind is how to go to office the next day. And at the end of the day re turn from office, search for a hotel to have dinner and after browsing net go dead till the next wake up.

Now when I go back down the memory lane I crave for those past days that I have spent and that I cannot get back again. That was a different life and this is different. Life will go on like this. Say at least a ‘no’. try once to step down the regular track, however it is not possible in the professional life and we cannot take risk with our job. We have simply fallen into pattern and that’s has become our daily life.

Sunday, April 17, 2011


I logged into my face book account and checked for new messages and updates from my friends. New photos uploaded comments on status messages, videos and pictures.  There one of my friends had set his thought that appeared on my wall. He had written in caps, 


Interesting? What is the impact of the line on your mind? It reflects the mind set of the individual at some situation that forced him to put his thought in that way. Just think a while about the line. What do you get?  Is there any eligibility criteria to love a girl?

I would like to know how many of you go with the line written in caps above.

So let’s talk about love first and then we will come to job.  To love a girl it needs a heart or a job that depends on you. Because you cannot ignore various aspects of a single situation. A few need a heart and may be others need a job. There can be another dimension, that you should have a job first and then a heart.

Now theoretically a heart is enough to make love with a girl. But things keep on changing, you know it better. Hope you can understand what I want to say. Practically you have to maintain the love relationship and in this case heart alone cannot help itself.  Things are some what like this. You have to talk to her on phone also; sometimes you may need to pay her phone bills. ( I am not saying this from my imagination, I have seen things happen like this)  You have to take her out for lunch or dinner. You show her that what you can do for her and pay the bill. You offer her surprise gifts and at least on her birthday it is a mandatory task. (Some order expensive birthday cake and offer her, which she and her friends devour if she stays in a girls’ hostel and you don’t even get a bit of it.)

If you want to do all these things you can not depend on you parent’s money always like you used to do in your college days (for those who have passed out). If you are still in engineering college or some other you can continue like this some more time. So you need a job if you want to have an expensive and extravagant love. 

Those who are in love please don’t mind.  Not all the people get a true lover. So for a kind of love where feelings play a role and for some where there has to be a maintenance charge to be paid. 

Do you feel I am going against man?  Let me talk about our counter part. Now all the girls are good at heart that can not be predicted. They also need some one who is caring about them. All of them cannot get a Prince William. Now what they mean from ‘caring’ they only know that. So they want someone with a job, which could be more helpful (for both).

Now you know you need a job or a heart to love, or a bit of both. Let me know your view.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Local Bus

In a big city like Bangalore, where the working class people have to travel to their respective working location bus is a convenient and reliable way of conveyance. This is what people of Bangalore find; I don’t need to prove this point. I have spent more than 7 months in the city. 

You work in an MNC or in the Tin Factory. You are looking for job in this city of hope or you want to go home. It is a bus that can take to your destination.

That’s true. More than private bus in this city people prefers Govt. buses. There are hundreds of buses with different names; they are christened in an alphanumeric manner like 500A, C-1,201 j…. . We can get many buses from a place to different locations frequently. 

Still there is an ugly picture behind the local bus journey. Bangalore is a metropolitan city. And the traffic here is terrific. Five days a week I have to go to office since the day I got job. And I can say in these 20 days I have earned a very bad experience.  Every day morning at 7am I have to get a bus from Marathalli to Electronic city. Morning is the best time because there is less traffic. But from Silk Board, I have to change bus and there are a lot of people who wait for the bus and its like participating in a competition to get into the bus.

Now if you are inside the bus after this much of struggle then don’t expect a seat. There are more people in the bus who go standing than the seated ones. In this less space the conductor would any how manage to come to you and you have to get a ticket. Though the bus gets overloaded they would pick more and more passenger. Now its time for the conductor to shout salpa.. salpa.. banni.. banni.. something something.. in kannada. Those two words seem funny for one who does not know kannada but by saying these words he is telling you to get inside and if you are close to your destination then get down soon.  I also don’t know, people shout “door open madi” for the door to be open. And you fight for a little space to stand in side the bus.

Earlier when I used to for a walk-in, generally on Saturday morning you would find only freshers   who are waiting for the bus and there the condition goes worse than other days.

While returning from office now there is war declared every day at silk board bus stop.  There are hundreds waiting for these local buses to go towards tin Factory. When a bus comes people surround near the gate, before the bus comes to halt they also run along with the bus.  As the door opens many of the try to enter through the door that can only allow 2 people at a time. 

One day I had also involved myself in this and I was pulled by someone behind me and I had to abort. There were times when I had to wait more than an hour to get a bus to Marathalli.  Believe me not a single bus goes without being overloaded. 

There are AC Volvos but that are not given priority by the people where a majority of them are of middle class also the fare is a factor. But in the evening, by the time when the offices close they are also in same situation.

There are seats reserved for ladies in the bus. One day 2 girls were seated in front of the seat me and my friend had occupied.  A big man from both height and stomach came and told the girls to leave the seat because there are seats for them at front. The girls left the seat, and the man struggled to sit, at that time I passed a comment ‘ is the seat enough for him to sit?’ the man looked back. I pretended as if I had told nothing. I didn’t want to invite trouble. The man kept looking back time to time.

Though it is tough sometimes in local bus due to traffic and heavy transaction of people but they somehow play a role in running the general urban life. 

Monday, April 11, 2011

Schooling is of No Value

Why did I go to school for ten years? That is not a small time period.  How can you waste 10 years of your life man? In these 10 years a lot of thing can happen and no need to explain, you are capable enough to imagine. 

Did I go to school to learn a, b, c, d… or 123... .??? My parents taught me at home before I learnt them at school. There are a lot of things that are taught at school, the thing that we term ‘education’ we get at school and at home.  Don’t say tech school or business school, they are there only to amalgamate tension to our lives.

In school we read a lot of things I would not use the word ‘learnt’.  We read mathematics, science, social science, history, geography and civics. The teachers told about manners and a lot of things. Those little things we were taught in school are highly useful in our day to day life that we ignore. 

But looking at the life it does not seem they have a value today.  That schooling has lost its significance as we grew older. You think about it. Is not it true?  There are numerous things that I can not put light on them but I can cite a few.

How many of you go to see the flag hoisting on Jan 26th or Aug 15th. They were very auspicious and energetic childhood days once, when you used to give slogans to the loudest of your voice.

In science we read about various causes of pollution and different kinds of pollution. Still people feel that burning the rubbish that is thrown in the dust bin will clean the locality. Don’t you have common sense that it pollutes the air?

We should not smoke, we should not hew tobacco. That we read in school and our teachers told us a long back. Who can remember things for a long time? They are just a burden on memory. (But I don’t find what people say, smoking can give you relieve from tension or pressure.)

Leave all these things; they don’t make any sense as we grow.  That’s what our notion is. They were good when we were in school. Now we are grown ups. Time has changed. Who gives a damn about it?

If you had to become and an engineer or doctor what was the need to go to school. You could have learnt a, b, c, d… at home. That was not a hard task. Learning English words after knowing alphabets is easier. Then you would have joined Pre University College. It is so sad that you had to join school because it has become a rule. You must be regretting ‘why-did-I-go-2-school’ when it is not useful life any professional course.

Saturday, April 9, 2011

ATM: out of service

Think of the day when all cash machines go out of service then what will happen. How crowded the banks would become??
Where would you go for money if the ATM is not working or though working it is out of cash and the bank is closed after 5 in the evening??????

I had to draw money in the evening because I had to pay the hostel rent and needed it badly for the upcoming expenses. Whenever it comes to withdrawing money the first thing that reflects is the nearest cash machine. So I walked to the SBI ATM in Munnekolala, the locality where I am staying at present in Bangalore. It was around 6.30 pm. there was a guard in blue shirt and black pant inside the Counter enjoying the AC sitting on a chair. I pushed the door to get in and he said the machine was out of cash. I needed money badly, so I turned towards the Marathalli Bridge. There are two SBI cash counters there. Again bad luck, the first one was not working; there was a display message on the screen ‘TEMPORARYLY OUT OF SERVICE’. There were other people in need of money, but they were also disappointed. I drifted towards the other one, which was about a hundred meters away from it. Others followed suit. I increased my pace so that I could reach before them and have an advantage as we have to stand in a queue. It is a FIRST IN FIRST OUT process. And I discovered a long queue than expected. Still I had to be there to get money. There were girls, old man, married woman and others in the same line waiting for their turn.

Life gets stuck at the ATM machine if it is not functioning. Everyday people need money and on holidays the bank remains closed. But it is also not possible to go to bank to with draw money. Earlier people were used to it, due course of time because of ATM it became easier, no need of bank to draw money ATM machine is enough provided it should have cash. In case of urgency a man can eye only at the ATM for money if he has the card. When it goes dead think how much trouble u have to face?

 One of the two cash machines had no cash, there was a NO CASH tag kept hand written on the machine. There was a guard who monitored the crowd for smooth running of the cash drawing process. I started counting the number of persons standing, and mine was just 27. I sighed; there were a few behind me also. I saw some frustrated faces return as they found the queue longer than the length of their patience.  Two girls stood a person ahead of me and they were talking in Oriya. One of them was good looking. The old aged guard grumbled on a bunch of Assamese girls over some matter and spoke in Kannada, neither the girls nor I could understand.  One of those girls babbled something and I only understood 2 of her words ‘pagal buddha’. It was already 8.15pm when my time came.  Still there seemed to be the same length queue and more people were coming to withdraw money. While returning I mused where the 2 girls would have gone.

Monday, April 4, 2011

Back to Me

I don't need any friend
I don't need any lover
I am just ignored
Like dustbin in corner

They throw their problems
At me, when required
Who cares for me
Otherwise I am deserted

All are selfish
All are mean
All with dirty mind
And no one clean

I want to change
To be a better man
But again pushed back
To my own bitter condition

Do I need to suicide
Should I quit breathing
Only once dies a man
You kill me time & again

That same dull shy guy
A loner, a speechless observer
This world does not need
I will be back to me. 

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Cup of Hope, Cup of Life

The match had already begun in minds and it was to come on screen.  Each and every one with one common important wish ‘India to win the World cup’. Will the history repeat after 28 years, it has been a long time since India held the world cup trophy? It was going to happen in 2003 but Australia then snatched away the glorious moment from us. Now it was time for Team India to avenge, for kangaroos India is not a suitable place, so they returned home in the quarter finals. 

It was the all time rivalry that reflected in the semifinals with Pakistan, since 1947 may that be politics or anything we always have competition and an appetite to defeat the other. Once again this year after 2003 India defeated Pakistan in World Cup semifinals. Now the hope of 100crores of people was strengthened, the hope of cup. The day India defeated Pakistan there were celebrations all round, millions of people and millions of reason of joy. People came to roads in the midnight with shrieks of victory. There were the bikers who roamed around in excitement. The happy noise of crackers filled the environment, lights in the dark sky.

And the day came when India had to face Sri Lanka, the strong contender of the world cup. The match began and India got a good start but later Sri Lanka bounced back and succeeded in making a defendable score. I was watching in my friend’s room and we were 8. The Team was tensed on the ground and the viewers watching live were also in the same state.  Indian batting started and because of malicious bowling of Malinga India lost two of its great batsman. When Sachin got out there, we nurtured a feeling that scarcely there was a chance of winning, but the hope was not lost. If not Sachin, then Gambhir. If not Gambhir then Yuvraj otherwise Dhoni. There should be some one to Lead India to victory. With each ball pitched on ground there was an attached emotion that bounced. Gambhir played a responsible innings and Dhoni played the role what a captain should do.  The lost hope was restored. India gradually drifted towards the world cup. And the match finished with a HUGE SIX hit by Dhoni, after a long time he gave his signature finishing. 

With that Significant victorious end the celebrations started in and out of the field. At last Sachin got his world cup. India was gifted with the World Cup again after 28 years, really a long time. 

Boisterous noise filled the environment. Again the same joyous situation came same as that of the day of victory over Pakistan but this time with an added flavor that we have won. It was not just a simple win. People again on streets and this time with beers of cheers.  Greeting and hugging each other in this rare moment. Spraying beers on each other and the Indian flag was flying high, bikers moved with the flags in hand. Fire crackers with each noise told that we won, we won, and we won. 

A salute to those who made India glorious and a salute to those who did not lose faith in the critical situation.